I finally took it upon myself to start my writing blog. It’s amazing how long I have procrastinated on actually writing anything in that blog. I created that blog maybe more than a year ago, and the other day I barely wrote my first post. It was more of an introduction post, but nonetheless it was a post and a first step is a first step no matter how big or small it is.
I am excited to write. Of course, I’m not a college grad or in college to say the least, but I do have a dream. So for the moment I want to practice with my imagination, which is mainly why I created the writing blog. To practice. Since my writing skills aren’t not at its best don’t expect anything that is mind blowing, or do? Who knows, maybe I’ll write something that is actually semi good. In the mean time, I’ll be here, writing.
Tomorrow is my first day back to work form my almost four week family leave. I know I will be asked so many questions regarding my absence. I’ll also have to be updated on any new things that may have changed while I was gone. It will be hectic, maybe even a little stressful, but I know I will be able to hang in there.
The thing is getting back to a normal routine. Getting back to the rhythm of things is always hard. I know this for a fact. I’ve been eating without limits, going to bed at random hours, and relaxing at home with no worries. But all this will change now that I am forced to be somewhere for eight hours a day five days a week.
Also happening tomorrow, my mom will be seeing her doctor to check up on her post surgery. She’s doing so much better and manages to get around. I’m so glad I was here to help her through everything and more than happy she is doing better and content with how the surgery went.
There’s no doubt that the end of this October will be full of new surprises and busy and new things .
I have been letting myself go recently. The past few weeks have been really hectic. I have been up and down and getting ready for my mother’s surgery and then bringing her home after having her at the hospital for a week of recovery.
Having little time and also being tired from going here and there really doesn’t give you the energy to make a healthy homemade meal. So, I’ve been eating out, and when I say eat out I mean eating out. Plus, it does not help when people want to help you out by also feeding you with fast food.
While I was at the hospital for a week with my mom, friends would bring me lunch and it was always something from a fast food place. I didn’t mind at first but now I’m feeling it. My hands, legs, and feet all feel the same to me. But my stomach and man boobs are screaming at me to stop.
Once I was sucked into the world of fast food I couldn’t stop. I didn’t stop. As a matter a fact, just today, I went to the store. While there, I bought three cans in Pringle’s. Why? I didn’t even have a craving for them I just got them because I felt the need to. I bought M&M’s. I had Starbucks. And to top it all off I went to McDonald’s and bought a McChicken sandwich.
I ate all of it myself. I sit here and realizing what I have become. Even now, I just finished two hotdogs. I wasn’t hungry. I was extremely still full. Why did I eat? All of the things I consume is out of satisfaction. Not because I need to eat it and not because I want to, it’s just to satisfy something that I am missing. What am I missing?
I’m not sure.
But what I am sure of is I need to get back to my routine. I need to get back to exercising. I need to get back to eating healthier. I need to find a better way to control my anxiety instead of just eating it.
Yesterday was my twenty-fourth birthday. I don’t usually celebrate it at all because of my religion and if or when I do or did it was never on my actual birthday. This time it was different because I did it in the exact day and it was a blast.
Me and a couple of friends headed to the beach. Malibu to be exact. I love the beach. There’s something about hearing the waves crash on the shore and then get carried back to the ocean is just so relaxing.
Being with friends and just being surrounded with positive vibes felt great. I don’t feel twenty-four yet. I barley even felt the age that I was before. This birthday was the best birthday I’ve ever had.
After the beach we finished our day off at IHOP or IHOB, what ever it’s called now. They have pretty great burgers and fries honestly. My day was great. I really loved it.
This feeling is bliss has to remain in me for a couple of more days.
Ok so I have made it through yet another week of working 80 hours in one week. Some times I feel like I can’t go on and then I say to myself, hey you! You are a bad ass. Look at you, working two jobs, taking care of your family, getting those bills paid, and still manage to have a social life. You got this. Keep it up.
My new position at my first job has not brought any struggles or challenges yet but I figure they will soon. No good thing last long.
Yesterday I went out with some close friends to Applebee’s for their one dollar margaritas. I had two. They were pretty strong and I enjoyed both of them . I always enjoy the time I spend with them.
One of my friends was kind of grumpy since it was close to midnight but we still had a good time.
I bought a self help book. It claims to help you out to Life life in an awesome way. Don’t know what that means. I bought it thinking it would help me be more outspoken or less shy, maybe it will. I looked at many books but this was the one that I liked . I think it was mainly because of the tittle, Your are a Badass.
So far it’s really funny but hasn’t really helped me out much. Maybe once I’ll get more into it.
Other than that this week has flown by. I keep say dam my life is passing by so fast. And it is. Too fast. Wish it would slow down just a tad bit, so I could enjoy it a little more .
I got the job! Well let me explain. Should have written this before buuuuut. Anyway I had an interview at a answering phone service and they really liked me, like really liked me. I think I was possessed by a charming charismatic ghost because I blew them away.
I think it’s a new me. It’s time for a new me. Hey if Taylor Swift can reinvent herself and come back like the bad ass that she is why cant I? I think that’s my new gaol.
Be more outspoken, more spontaneous, louder, be less timid. I am an incredible person inside and I feel like the world should see that. Although, yes, it will take time to develop the skills and all but I know I can accomplish it. Watch me.
In other news. My typing is getting better. Also one more week to Sequoia and I’m freaking the fuck out! I know I say how much I want to go and it’s getting repetitive and all and it’s all true like I can’t stop thinking about it. I wish that I could stay longer there and see more because one day won’t be enough but I will make the most of it.
Earlier today, my uncle and aunt came to visit from out of town. They are from my dads side of the family but they still really care about my mom, and us. They came to see how she was doing with the whole cancer thing. And she’s actually doing great. They just left a while ago. They took us out to eat and it was delicious. Sizzler.
Any who I feel like I haven’t been on here for years and I hate that. What’s going to happen when I start my second job? Well, I make time for it for sure, because I love writing. Wow this post is all over the place it doesn’t even make sense. K bye.