Yesterday we went to the oncologist and finally got the results on my mom's breast cancer tissue and what type of cancer it was. I think it was something like invasive carcinoma. She wrote it down on our paper because it was a tricky word. But she said if there was cancer that if you had to have a cancer this one was the one to have. Doctors and their doctors sense of humor.
Basically it's three hormones to feed the cancer cell. So estrogen, progesterone, and HER 2 negative. That's what this type of cancer feeds off. And my mom had the combination of the three. Well don't quote me on this, she has estrogen and progesterone, but she was negative on HER 2 which is a protein or something that controls how healthy breast cells grow, so obviously with out it it's perfect for cancer to grow.
Now that we knew what happened we could find a solution. The doctor said she didn't need to have chemo, which was great news. We didn't want to go through all that pain since it was already hard enough. So she said instead she would just have to take a pill… for ten years.
At first I laughed because I thought she had miss placed her words or she was joking like doctors do, but no, she was serious. It's called Tamoxifen. It's an anti-estrogen hormone. So she said that that will stop them from coming together and forming any other cancer cells on the other breast.
I was looking into the drug and it seems pretty good. The doctor said there's almost a 100% survival rate after five years which is really really great news. The thing is it's a good $100 to get per month. We haven't gone to get it at the pharmacy yet, we will today, I'm hoping that our insurance covers it.
Update, it did. At least for about five months. It has some side effects though. Not that all bad but we just have to keep an eye on her. I'm glad we're getting though this. It has been the toughest year yet for us but some how we managed to get through it. Really makes me smile and feel good to see how strong my family is.
Today was a weird day. Woke up at 2:30 in the morning for a run like I have been doing. Since I go in at four AM I have to wake up early to run (because #fitfam LoL ew). Soon that will stop though, once i start going in at six again. Anyway, work was super easy. It was Friday and I just wanted to be done. But then they told us we had to work tomorrow, which should have bothered me seeing as it's the weekend and I have a life and by life I mean pending shows to watch on Netflix but it actually didn't.
There was a town hall meeting and they told us that the contract was renewed. So us (the distributors) will still be working for the client of the product we are distributing. Not sure if that makes sense, well in short, I have a job for at least another year. But I hope I'm working somewhere new maybe writing.
At that "meeting" I received two awards. One for attendance and another is for Outstanding Inventory Partner. It felt good to be recognized. Sometimes you do your work and feel so disconnected and forget there are actually people observing how hard you work. Hard work pays off.
No raise though which sucks.
After work I had an interview at a fast food restaurant but like the true me that I am, I didn't go. Anxiety got the best of me once again. It's cool though instead of putting myself down I just have to work on it. Practice. I know one day I will be outgoing and have a lot to say but until then I can be me in my little shell all I want.
Oh, I almost forgot, so speaking of work. Our inventory manager quit right out of the blue and good thing she did I hated hat bitch. Apparently she texted my lead yesterday saying she wasn't going to come in today because the "new employer" wanted her to start working today. So she left my lead in charge. That's crazy though who quits like that? Like, on hey, just letting you know I'm not going to go to work today, I have a new job. I just find that so hysterical. So now we don't have a supervisor or a manager. I really want my lead to take her spot. That way I can move up to lead. Then I'll get a pay raise. Hallelujah.
Also, one of my friends is heading to Mexico for the weekend. And get this, since we have a streak on Snapchat (it's like a fire flame thing that counts how many continuous days you snap chat a person) he didn't want to ruin it. So he gave me his login. So I can snap chat myself as him and not lose the streak! To you it may sound like cheating but to me that's friendship. That like made our friendship points go through the roof. True friend. Don't know many people that would do that honestly. I just think it's super cool. Like, would your friend just lend you their logins to their social media accounts?
In the looks of money shortage I have decided to start a Go Fund Me account. It wasn’t an easy decision. I am one of those people that doesn’t like to ask for help. Not because I am full of pride and what not, but because I don’t want to be dead weight on someone. I don’t want to seem like I am burden on someone. But things are complicated right now.
My moms surgery turned out to be successful and things are looking great for her. Yes we’re still having trouble with the insurance again, and this time for the oncologist. Granted we were having trouble with them since the beginning. For instance, they are charging us the first appointments we went to back in March and April which some up to the hundreds. Things are hard as it is and with bills being pilled up on top just makes everything even more stressing.
Yesterday my dog past away which just added more grief to the already huge mountain we have. I created this Go Fund Me account a while back a couple of weeks before we knew that my mom had breast cancer. I never published it or shared it because I was scared to. What would people say? How would I look? Like a failure? Like someone who couldn’t keep it together? These thoughts pushed me back and I thought I could do it on my own, but it seems like I can’t.
I have been at my lowest for a while and I just need a little help getting back up. You don’t need to donate if you don’t want to, some words of encouragement will go a long way as well. Either way thank you.
So because of the well known fact that one day, I, myself, will be one of New York Times best selling authors (kidding, see picture above) I was thinking that I should get started by writing. No, I’m not going to college for English or literature, and no my writing is not the best, but hey, I’m a work in progress. And I believe in myself which is what counts right? I feel that during the course of this blog I have learned a lot. Like the difference between loose and lose. And also bare and bear. English is weird. But nonetheless I love reading it!
I plan on creating another blog where I can publish short stories and maybe chapter books. One chapter per post of course. Maybe one day I can go to college get the education everyone so calls “a must” and know how to write professionally. But for now I have a blog. And that will do pig, that’ll do. I just love writing. And I don’t want to be working a scheduled job all my life. Writing a book is my dream. It would actually be a dream come true, and you never know, it could happen.
These flowers were given to me today by my friend Eli. She texted me yesterday that she wanted to give something to my mom and asked if it was ok to come over. She hasn’t met my mom, but I was going to the store today that’s by her house and I told her we should just meet up close by there so she wouldn’t have to drive all the way here and we could chat a while .
I hadn’t seen her in over four months I think. Since that last time we went to the park togther. It was nice seeing her. And even though I just wanted to talk to her alone I’m glad her husband went as well. Or else I would have been all mopey and gloomy about everything. I’m glad I got to see both if them. It was nice catching up. I really do miss her and I wish we would talk and hang out more. Hopefully the future changes. But life is weird. I’m optimistic right now but that changes really fast. We’ll see what happens , anything can happen.
I think it was really nice of her to give these to my mom. She really liked them. She also have me a little care that’s said hang in there. Telling me that even though things are hard right now they will get better. I hope so, but I don’t know. I should just start going with the flow. The flow seems to be moving pretty well so. I shall move along as well, because in the end life keeps rolling even if you dont.